Whether we like it or not, our unwanted thoughts and painful emotions determine so much of our lives— but only because we avoid them. COMMENTARY: Our discomfort determines so much of our lives—but only because we avoid it. We cultivate the capacity to remain with discomfort so that our lives aren’t fully determined by habitually and unthinkingly avoiding it—so that we have choice (even if our choice is precisely to avoid it). To “remain” with discomfort requires becoming directly aware of it…